Republicans are Enemy Combatants? (May 10, 2010)
. . .
U “I noticed on the Internet a few minutes ago that all registered Republicans have been deemed enemy combatants and will be rounded up on Tuesday at 3:00 a.m. and taken to undisclosed locations.”
R “No way.”
U “It’s your call. I believe that I’m safe. I am registered as Unaffiliated. But who knows today.”
R “I’ll call my lawyer.”
U “You don’t get to call your lawyer. That quaint right protected by activist liberal Democrats has been expunged. Your cell phone has been disabled and will be confiscated.”
R “It isn’t working, . . . but they are installing a new tower.”
U “Assume that you are able to contact a lawyer. Then what?”
R “I know a judge who owes me.”
U “Owes a terrorist what? That is bad press for him. At best, you might get an answering machine and no answer. What would he do for you?”
R “Get me out. Habeas corpus me. It’s a legal way to get me released. It means that the authorities must deliver the body to the court.”
U “The authorities might oblige and deliver your body to the court. The Republicans have you covered. They suspended habeas corpus. At least one Republican did. Recall our good friend Abraham Lincoln who suspended habeas corpus.”
R “What about Democrats? They could be deemed enemy combatants. They could be confiscated.”
U “They could. And they could. And they might.”
. . .
Bumper sticker of the week:
I wasn’t using my civil rights anyway.