e-commentary

. . .

M          “Not the West or a building foundation.  Settling.  In life.”

S          “I hear you.”

M          “Nine out of ten.”

S          “Really.  A quick guess or a settled belief?”

M          “Ten out of ten, really.  I am rounding down to factor in a margin of error.”

S          “Another buddy with some perspective said that he suspects the figure is around seventy percent, although the percentage is dependent on age, income and geography.”

M          “For most people, it’s a matter of time.  It’s time to do it.  The music is stopping.  Who is available?  That’s about it.  Okay, the process is subconscious and more complex.  Think about it.  Did you get into the college of your choice?  Are you working at the job of your choice?  Every day and every decision in life is a series of compromises.”

S          “You must go to college.  You must work.  And you appeared smitten, you didn’t settle.”

M          “Curly blond hair and straight ivory teeth.  Tolerated my sense of humor.  It was the right time.  And she said yes.  An uncle passed up his college sweetheart and never found another person.  There are ups and downs.  Your take?”

S          “I’ve collected data and generated a few hypotheses.  Market forces are at play.  In today’s market society, the decision to marry and the decision to stray are primarily a function of options and/or perceived options.  Costs and benefits shape character and drive behavior.  Hard to generate interdependent utility curves in a pop market of individuals ruthlessly maximizing their own utility.  Character, commitment and integrity are secondary.  Raw yet realistic.  Public Choice theory underpins the ultimate private choice.”

M          “At some point, you look at your options and go for it.  That’s life.”

S          “Say someone shares seven of eleven essential tenets, convictions and interests?”

M          “Bingo.  Eureka.  Game over.  That’s life.  That’s as good as it gets.”

S          “Or the game just changes.  Seems that it could lead to the ‘Original Resentment.’  Can’t do it.  Still not enough.  I understand the logic, sort of, yet it does not seem to be the healthiest approach in the long run.”

M          “You compromise and settle every day.”

S          “Every day brings another dose of disappointments.”

. . .

Bumper stickers of the week:

Was the West unsettled?

Why not build the foundation slightly lower?

. . .

a     “Like I care.  I can’t drink until I am 21.  Whatever.  I can drink anytime.  School is the marketplace for drug deals.  I can’t drive until I am 16.  Getting a car is the only problem.  The best thing about being an adult is that I can drink and I can drive.  And I can drink and drive.  The great American pastime.  Just like an adult.  And no one can tell me what to do.  They tell me to grow up.  Seems to me that adulthood is all about being dishonest, hypocritical, shallow, petty and materialistic.  Adolescence is miserable, but adulthood is soooo overrated.  And look at what you are giving us.  There is not much to look forward to.  What do I care.”

A     “Transcend.”

a     “What?”

A     “Transcend.  The craziness and the insanity.  The folly and the foolishness.  The ignorance and the stupidity.”

a     “Right.  Transcend.  Get real.”

. . .

A     “With each passing year, I feel more disconnected.”

. . .

A     “You have been told to read between the lines.  Every day, I must read between the lies.  Foisted by other adults.”

. . .

A     “Before I answer, I need to know.  Have you heard of tertiary smoke?”

. . .

a     “At least you didn’t lie to me like every other adult.”

A     “Me, like every other adult.  Right.  That’ll be the day.”

. . .

a     “So life is kind of like high school repeated over and over and over again?”

. . .

[See the “e-ssay” dated August 28, 2006 titled “The Residue of Unrelenting Fear:  PTSD.”]

Bumper stickers of the week:

Politics is high school with guns and more money.  Frank Zappa

Growing old is mandatory, growing up is optional.  Don’t exercise the option.

Transcend

Razors pain you;

Rivers are damp;

Acids stain you;

And drugs cause cramp.

Guns aren’t lawful;

Nooses give;

Gas smells awful;

You might as well live.

Dorothy Parker

“I never even thought about it not working out.  I wasn’t even thinking.  Everyone is smiling and happy in the pictures.  Now our life is a stand off, a percolating feud.  I can’t fight and I can’t flee.  I go to my 10 by 10 foot cubicle every morning and yet feel lucky that I have a cubicle to go to every morning.  Then I go back to my other prison cell at night.  It’s like a work release program and, don’t get me wrong about the work, if I get released from work I’m a goner.  A friend let things get out of hand and found his hands tied.  By the police.  Power move.  He couldn’t get released over the weekend.  So now he sports the dv charge and vd.  I’d like to get in the car and drive until I run out of gas, money or road.  But I can’t.  So we fight passively.  She takes a shot and then I take a shot and then we flee to our corners and call a short truce.  The kids perceive everything.  Staying together may be better than separating.  When you think about it every day, it’s passive but it’s aggressive and it’s the only workable response.  I hope this isn’t too heavy.  You don’t need this.  If I didn’t get out here now and then, I’d explode.”

Bumper stickers of the week:

Marriage is grand; divorce is one hundred grand.

The Family – The Backbone Of A Community

A secret to a good marriage is to have a quick mind and a slow mouth . . .  Live so that when your children think of fairness, caring and integrity, they think of you.